From the very start of our existence, we create and grow friendships. We made sure our children had playtime with other children in the neighborhood or from their school, church, or synagogue. We want them to have a community of their own and learn how to grow their support system.
The friendship fostering continues through elementary, middle school, high school, and college. By the time we get to college, we have learned the values and the pitfalls of friendships…how to start, keep it going, and when to end them.
After the college years and through our adulthood we create our community by fostering friendships and building our support system.
Then…….sometimes our life changes, takes a different turn and we find ourselves in a situation where we need to leave our fostered community and plunge into an unknown environment. In this new environment, almost everyone already knows everyone with an established community of their own. This is where you feel out of place, the newbie, the strange one, the one that is trying to infiltrate into this new place, new groups of people. This could be a church, a club, a new job, etcetera.
Sometimes, we lose our circle of friends or that one best friend, and we feel lost. How do we build a new community and new friendships in the later years of our lives?
You will never know if a new group or person will be a good one to get to know until you give it a try. Say “yes” to opportunities to join a group or ask someone out for coffee.
Fostering friendships takes time, effort, and persistence. It takes you to make that first move. Friendships give us a sense of belonging, a sense of togetherness, serotonin, love, and acceptance.. Fostering friendships is work, but it’s work that can pay off.
This week, I challenge you to make a coffee/tea “date” with someone that you may know but not that well, or with a long-lost friend. Take the time to learn more about them and keep your mind open to a new or rekindled friendship possibility.
Can YOU be the person standing in your own way of fostering friendships?
Move out of your own way and let the friendships in.